I have always wondered why we use the term 'controlled crying' surely no crying can be controlled. If I was sad I would want someone to comfort me and not leave me to cry, come in and say two words and then leave me to it for five minutes before gradually making their visits fewer and more far between. So why do we do this to babies.
Can you really control an emotion?
Now don't get me wrong it really is a matter of personal choice but having tried and failed, I'm not sure it's the choice for me.
Yes my children don't sleep well so I am in no position to give advice, I just have to do what feels right for my babies. I often think about trying sleep training but as soon as I hear that little cry, the thoughts go out of my head and turn to getting into them to check they are ok.
Both Damien and Dennis have very strong wills. When we tried to control Damien at around 18 months of pure sleep deprivation and utter desperation it took 4 hours to complete. He finally fell asleep sat up, with his face pressed firmly against the cot bars. The technique did work for a few weeks until he became unwell and everything went out the window. We decides we couldn't face another 4 hours and that it just wasn't for us!
We may come across as weak for not being able to control cry but I think it shows strength to continue having disturbed sleep night after night, week after week, month after month.
I am not even talking about our little ones getting up once or twice a night. We went through a phase where we were up 7 or 8 times a night for weeks on end. It was relentless, stressful, exhausting and at points emotional but even at the worst points I would not go back to controlled crying.
Just because it's not for me doesn't mean it isn't for others. What are your thoughts? I would love to know what you think...